In honor of election day (don’t forget to vote!!) I want to take an informal poll. What is most important to you as a mom about your sexuality? What issues do you wish you heard more about? Are there any parts of the sexuality of mothers that you think are ignored and you would like to read more about?
I’d love it if you would take a moment and respond in the comments section (anonymously is fine) about what matters most to you as a mom in your sex life so that I can address those issues in future blog posts.
What matters to you?
Is it finding time to have a sexual relationship with your partner?
Is it keeping your sexual flame alive through masturbation?
Is providing your kids straightforward information about sexuality?
Tell us, what’s important to you?
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Here are a few things about my sexuality as a woman and a mom that I think are important:
– It matters to me for moms to know that it is okay feel very sexual sometimes (and to act on this in wild and crazy ways) and to know that it’s also okay when you don’t. There isn’t a right way, a wrong way, a right number, or a wrong number. As long as you are able to communicate openly what feels right to you.
-It matters to me that moms don’t forget how easy, quick, and enjoyable masturbation is and give themselves permission to do it!
-It matters to me that my children understand at an age-appropriate level that YES mom and dad have sex, YES we enjoy it, and YES it is an important part of our relationship. This means they learn to respect a closed door while mom and dad have alone time. This means that they also see us being flirtatious and physically affectionate with each other. This is some of the most important role-modeling we can give them–so they can have healthy sexual relationships of their own in the future!
-It matters to me that I feel able to communicate my sexual needs to my partner–what works and what doesn’t, even if it feels hard or embarrassing to do.
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Now, what matters most to YOU?
It mattered that I raised my boys knowing so many things:
that their private parts belonged to them–nothing wrong with touching them but a problem if someone else did
that “good feelings” were good, not just acceptable or something to be rejected–Roller coaster and bumps “tickeled their penis” and that was ok, not something to “shush” about but also something maybe to keep a bit private
that God has plans for us but at the same time we didn’t always follow those plans and he loved us for who we are…out of wedlock births were not rejected, or same sex marriage, or any of the many ways we make life a little more interesting
that sex is natural, normal and a part of being human–good and glorious and sometimes complicated